i wish i could talk to you in my sleep

so, i’m doing a scene from ‘waiting for godot’ for my final performance in december, with irina. i like irina, she is cool – although you can tell she used to be a depressive and can be greatly hyper-active. but, on the whole, i love her to pieces and she works hard – which gives me full incentive to work just as hard, or even harder. we’ve blocked just under half our scene already, in just a week. i’m pretty pleased with our progress. i have to say though, i’ve never felt so satisfyingly tired constantly, before. school is just so rewarding that i have no idea how to even verbalise it. i’m sure i’ll hate it in a coupla months, but right now, i can’t get enough. i am so sorry for not updating this more – i just don’t get enough time to. i barely even speak to ben. most days end with a coupla hours of rehearsals, and of course that’s not included in school time. except for this scene – because DJ (the teacher) is directing – but wants us to block it. it’s only so he can change everything anyway, but i guess if we are good, he lets us keep what we have. which is rare though, haha. we’ll be getting scenes too soon for meisner, and he’ll assign us partners, i reckon, because james price is like that. very meticulous and hard working. i just hope i don’t get stuck with someone who doesn’t work hard or someone that sucks – and there are a few of those in the class.

apologies to those of you whose emailes i haven’t responded to – i will do, soon. i’d just rather not write some bullshit email that i;ll need to correct in a few days because i didn’ bother trying in the first place. as you can tell, i am pretty fucking tired, but at the same time, very fucking happy :)

got a performance of my monologue next week – which will be nerve racking, but we’ll see how it goes.i’m so tired right now i can’t even see straight, i do need to sleep.

missing you people at home… say hi to london for me…

over and out.


“you are the dancing queeeeer…”

so nyc is fannytastic, it really is. but, i am fucking lonely. i’ve never really had to deal with it and motivate myself, so this is hard work.

for those of you, also, that think manhattan is like london (or vice versa) then perhaps on first glance it may seem so, but there are so many subtle differences, that they really are not the same. these are some of my personal observations/comments:

- manhattan is dirtier. much dirtier.
- both have a soho, chinatown and chelsea.
- the people here are MUCH crazier. they aren’t afraid to say anything to you – especially strangers.
- bars/pubs/clubs/cafes are open til 4am.
- bagels are overrated.
- tea is hard to buy (like, in a cup, not tea bags).
- guys are NOT afraid to check you out, ladies. and even if it means stopping in front of you directly and staring at you for like a minute or two.
- it is just as expensive to go out here than it is in london. however, buy backs are in operation here – to the bartender’s gain (see previous entry for what buy backs are). shitty bars are also not hard to find (2-4 bucks a beer), but are extremely dodgy if you are either all girls or on your own.
- people are generally quite friendly and helpful – or at least try to be.
- 95% of the people on the subway have no idea what stops follow the one you’re at.
- there are many more bums on the streets.
- new yorkers have no idea what ‘busking’ is, and yet it is everywhere you go on the streets and on the subway – and you do not need a permit to do it here. times square (42nd) is good for this, if you like this sort of thing – they take up A LOT of space to do this and crowds do gather.
- wireless operates in most parts of the city.
- brooklynites are the hardest of the new york citiers. they will fuck you up, if need be.
- new yorkers DO watch sex and the city.

that’s enough for now. god, i am so tired and sore. my back is hurting. i need a massage… might go find some small chinese lady to walk on me.

miss you all.

x


schoool is craaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazy

in the meisner class we’re taught by a guy who studied directly under sanford meisner, so i feel quite priviledged. in this class we have done ‘word repetition’ since school started. that’s 6 hours a week of returning word with your partner and saying them the way they do. then he added in the fact that we had to make it personal, so if someone did the first bit and made an observation about the other person and said ‘you’re wearing brown shoes’, i’d have to say ‘i’m wearing brown shoes’, which would then come back as ‘you’re wearing brown shoes’, etc etc you get the point. then it turned into a personal subjective observation, so ‘your brown shoes make me wanna puke’, which then goes back as ‘my brown shoes make you wanna puke’. so, yesterday’s lesson involved lots of fucking water. the teacher, james price, gave selected people squirty water bottles, which they could use when they felt the urge to use them. oh, by the way, the comments going back and forth can change if you get a feeling to change it, or if it’s untrue. so, for example, ‘your brown shoes make me wanna puke’ would go back as ‘my brown shoes make you wanna puke’, ‘your brown shoes make me wanna puke’, ‘hey, you’re not wearing brown shoes!’, ‘hey, i’m not wearing brown shoes’. and so on and so forth. and so, the squirty water bottles were used for fun mostly, but to get a reaction out of the people that don’t look alive or give enough energy to the exercise. or, in my opinion, to those who also he thinks should be pushed harder whether they’re working or not. which i think was me yesterday. he always likes when rebecca and i do our repetition and always comments on it being excellent, so i think he was just trying to wind me up yesterday by giving rebecca the water bottle. i did react for the most part, and tell her to ‘fuck off’, ‘fuck off’, ‘fuck off’, but the word fuck is used so many times in this game. it gets annoying after a while, so i changed it to ‘god, i hate that word’, ‘god you hate that word’. so, i never got the water bottle, which is annoying, but i lasted the task anyhow, and got completely drenched. yes, this is school by the way. NOW, to make it evern harder, we have to come up with a task to do which is difficult for monday’s class, which we have to do whilst doing the repetition exercise. i’m thinking i’ll get some needle, thread, buttons, etc etc and sew something for the teacher. he said the task had to be difficult (for the most part) and not time consuming, like a jigsaw puzzle, or a rubik’s cube. he suggested people bring in stuff to break and put back together – let’s see how many people do that. i saw a guy today walking round with a mop. i asked him what the hell he had that for and he said it was for the repetition exercise. god, i love school, so much random shit happens.

speaking of random – zenon, our acting technique teacher – made ting cry on friday. not only does he make us do sadistic leg and ab exercises which absolutely kill after an hour of doing them, he makes you work stupidly hard in class and expects a lot. he made ting cry because she has a monologue about an abortion and losing her husband, and she had to perform it. she did it and we all thought it was good. obviously, we were wrong(!) zenon, made her do this task where 4 of the boys in class had to act like a cage around her, and she had to pretend she was a frantic lion trying to get out of the cage. obviously she’s not going to get out, because there were 4 guys trapping her in. but, he made her work for it, harder and harder, until she fell to the floor screaming “i can’t do it!”. he made her get up and continue. she continued and finally he saw the results he wanted. she was not only getting tired, but he was mentally abusing her by physically abusing her. she started to cry and he made her do the monologue again. this time it was sheer perfection. we were all stunned. that was possibly the most weird and seriously cool lesson we’ve had so far. for this class, after my o-ren ishii monologue, i’m doing a scene with james on the end of ‘the crucible’. bought the play a few days ago, so i’ll start reading it now. this is due for next friday.

film study has been a selection of different classes taught by different teachers, spanning directing, producing, camera, shots, lenses etc. there are still loads more of these lessons left. but, they are the most boring because it means three classes sitting together (when it is only normally one – 12 people in our class) on chairs listening to someone ramble for three hours. our normal lessons are much more active and personally/intensely involved. so these classes drain you easily.

scene study class is taught by dj mendel, who is an insanely cool teacher who doesn’t take shit from anyone. if you’re late, you have to wait for the break (an hour and a half in) before he lets you in. to be fair, most of the teachers do that. they can’t stand people not being punctual, because if you actually did that on a set, you’d just get sent home/be replaced. so, i guess it’s good practice. for this class i am now working with hussein, who lacks a lot of motivation, energy and creativeness, so this is going to be so much hard work. we have to present what we have done so far, on tuesday, and i gotta spend a lot of time with this kid, so we’ll see how that goes.

in monologue class (taught by kate gleason) we’re preparing for a performance on the 26th of october. got a monologue which is about 3-4 minutes long, which is just hard to do. i have to be happy and jolly about everything my character says, even though she discusses some seriously depressing shit. might sound easy, but it’s not. gotta learn this piece (taken from ‘hush’, by april de angelis) by next wednesday.

acting for film class (taught by norman schwartz) is fun, but also boring. we’re filming our work and watching it over for continuity and speech delivery, whilst at the same time learning about the camera, boom and slate. the only problem is that norman writes the SAME GODDAMN SHIT on the white board every lesson. it’s like he just likes to write on the board or something. also, he’s like 172 years old, so he talks slow anyway. i mean, he’s great on paper (put his name in imdb), but a seriously weird choice for a teacher.

voice and movement class (taught by mary workman – she used to date the guy who just won an oscar for writing ‘sideways’) is fucking brilliant! we’re singing, and dancing around and having a ball. she’s teaching us how to move and speak, and where the sounds come from and how to adopt accents. she’s telling us how to pronounce things from different parts of the world and where they use their mouths and in what ways to get their accents. jolly good phun. my class moment was when she said british people say ‘guvner’. i had to correct her and tell her it’s ‘guvnah’. tut tut. haha, she’s a good sport though, she didn’t take offence.

—————–

as for general news; i’ve been out dining with curtis, drinking with classmates – but i haven’t seen much of the astoria lot who i hung around with when i first got here. kraki came over today, which was cool, so we hung out and he was telling me touristy things to do with benny when he gets here tomorrow! yay!

right, got a monologue to perfect for tomorrow and then need to sleep – not been getting much of that recently.

sleep tight you widdle monkeys.

over and out.


one month, tomorrow!

my downstairs neighbour laughed at me yesterday because i was counting how long i’d been here. tomorrow is a full month, and also jordan’s birthday, so we’re all gonna head out and celebrate. got monologues to learn, and now the end of ‘the crucible’ (scene partner is james). still got a scene to work on with jordan, but he’ll be out on the piss most of the time for this weekend and tomorrow, so i doubt that’ll get done. time to work hard now though.

was at jordan’s last night with some of the rest of class, took big ben also. it was movie night, and that turned into jordan having deep and meaningfuls with becks, me playing texas hold ‘em with cody (crashes with jordan) using wine for the raises. that turned ugly this morning – never play with red wine… that’s my helpful tip for today.

gonna just grab some work and head off to central park, got lots to read and learn. gotta buy the crucible also. wow, i feel really low today.

the park calls…


monologues

so, school work is pretty hectic at the moment. gotta have 2 more monologues on top of the one i’ve already found for wednesday. the one i have atm is o-ren ishii’s quote in kill bill, where she is mocked by a member of the council. here’s the monologue:

——
O-Ren Ishii: As your leader, I encourage you to — from time to time and always in a respectful manner — to question my logic. If you’re unconvinced a particular plan of action I’ve decided is the wisest, tell me so. But allow me to convince you. And I will promise you, right here and now, no subject will be taboo … except, of course, the subject that was just under discussion. The price you pay for bringing up either my Chinese or my American heritage as a negative is, I collect your fucking head. (holds up a decapitated head) Just like this fucker here. Now if any of you sons of bitches got anything else to say, NOW’S THE FUCKING TIME!! … I didn’t think so.
——

so yeh, it’s a cool little monologue, which kicks arse. i have two more to find by wednesday, and obviously we can only do them if the teachers like them and think they suit us.

got some lines to learn for tomoro, so i’mma head off and learn those…

ta-ra.


sombre-ness

today was mellow.. very mellow. got up at like 11:30, hung around for a bit then decided to venture out of my room. i keep my door closed because the cats do things to me in my sleep. slept with the door open once – not doing that again. so, anyway, i venture out of my room and pete is about to go into the shower. so i knock on the door and he opens in absolutely STARKERS and freaks out and closes it. i wonder what the hell just happened, and then realised sarah was naked too in her room, but i looked away before she noticed me. so, then they explain that they didn’t know i was home. this happened because i called sarah last night. sheesh.

the day went slowly, i made my way into manhattan to do school work with jordan – which never got done. it’s due for tuesday anyway. we ended up going for dinner instead in quite a nice italian restaurant. which was nice.

came home, relaxed for a bit. dane came over with some beers, we had a few then he left. i just washed my hair and i’m gonna head off to bed soon after updating the rest of my blogga :)

night!

x


six flags

so i got woken up today by curtis who called to remind me that we’re going to six flags – a chain of theme parks, of which one is in jersey. problem with this was that it was 07:30 in the morning and i was hungover and extremely tired. i got up anyway 30 minutes later and set off to get ready and meet curtis in town. i got to grand central, we then got a train out to his place in white plains, where his friend jennifer and his dad were waiting for us in a car. we drove straight to six flags from there. i was so tired i fell asleep for a bit in the car.

upon arrival, we decided to go on the the newest and biggest ride there – kingda ka. this ride is the biggest and fastest rollercoaster in the world, which opened this year. it’s just under 500 feet high, goes 0-128 mph in 3.5 seconds and is ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT! the ride goes vertically straight up and comes vertically straight down – with corkscrews also. the rush of going down at that speed was an amazing thrill. you come off that ride going “again!”, “again!”. although, saying that, i do that on most rollercoasters. we waited in line for two hours – i complained like a beeeatch all the way through it, but it was so worth it. we went on lots of other rides and rollercoasters too, but the most important part of the day was being with curtis’ dad. being with him was a sensational experience because he is partially blind – closer to blind than actually being able to see. experiencing these rides with someone who cannot see very well is crazy. he describes what he sees and how he sees it, and because he’s been like that all his life, he’s very much used to dealing with it. he can recognise people from their shapes and colours – much like a baby would. he’s an incrdible guy who has experienced a lot – he even studied/taught at imperial college! ;)

on the way home, i fell asleep as i had had very little sleep from the night before, but came back to astoria onlyto find kraki calling me to come go to ‘rapture’ (nice bar down the road from us), because everyone was there. so i turned up, and jake, margie (his new gf), kraki, selene, diana and anke were all there. funnily enough, rebecca from class is there also, with her bf adam, and his two friends. so it turned into a pretty cool day all in all. when i got there though, i called up sarah because i couldn’t find my house keys in my handbag. i got drunk, and managed to find them later, ironically. bar kicked us out at like 2:30 and i came home.

very busy day this was. tomoro is 9/11.


busy busy busy

so school was fun today, as always – we’re learning new things! we filmed our office scenes and did master shots, close shots and two shots. chris, the tech guy who films, is gonna cut all the work together and show it to us next lesson. i came home after class and hung out with kraki and dane in our apartment. i then got ready for a night out on the town and we left for a bar called ‘pianos’ which plays live music. kraki’s mate is in a rockabilly/country type band, and we had some good fun watching them. There were only like 20 people in the room, so after I’d had a few I decided it was time to get rowdy! There were like 6 people on stage and after a while we felt like line-dancing. Yes, I know, I wanted to shoot me too. After one of the songs, I screamed out “Take your shirt off!!” to one of the band members and he motioned to his shirt and his geetar and said that he couldn’t. When they’d finished their set, they said they have a barter system for their demo CD, so the audience have to give them something. Of course, I had to have one. Someone gave a new pair of undies, and someone else gave an umbrella. I looked around and couldn’t find anything. So, I asked if I could give away a friend and they said “if you wanna do that then they’re not your friend”. Good point. So, my brain kicked in, and i screamed out “Can I GIVE you a kiss?!”. The front woman then said yes and motioned me towards the stage. She then said they’d all close their eyes and that I’d have to pick someone of my own accord. Okay, so I looked at my options – I could really only get to 3 people because equipment was in the way of the other three. Then they all started pointing at the guy I was giving aggro to earlier. So, they made my choice for me. I expected to go there and just peck his lips. When I did that he he opened his eyes in surprise and stuck his tongue down my throat! i moved away then, but still got a free CD :)

the rest of the night sucked actually. there were the usual few of us on a rooftop bar on the corner of 33rd and 8th, i think. i spent the rest of the night not talking to very many people as they were all busy talking to others. so i got bored and eventually the bar kicked us out, and the astoria lot came home. i got six flags to go to tomoro… it’s not looking hopeful. but, who knows? ;)


oh yeh…

…it hit me today…

I’M LIVING IN NYC!

*dances*


Day three

well, day three was really tiring. learnt a lot about characters and focal points (head, chest, heart, knees, feet), and also did some singing – which was nice :D the guy from london that i met here has already had a movie shoot – i’m jealous :( but, apparently he said he got it because he’s been in a few short movies before. dunno if he got recommended or if he read it off the noticeboard, however.

then liz and i decided to go for some grub then randomly went to see the musical ‘rent’ – which is absolutely awesome, by the way. acting is superb, singing is OFF DA HOOK and general atmosphere was just amazing. they got a standing ovation from the crowd (i was one of the first people to stand up :) ) and the ovation atmosphere was alive!

losing weight has become a priority for me.

‘rent’ put me in a fabulous mood. i hope i sleep well tonight…